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Four years since an update, but i've been busy.

1/30/2019

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I just realized that the last post I posted here was four years ago and that I was all excited for new projects, etc.

I guess I was, because I haven't come back here since, or updated my photography facebook page, or anything.

BUT that doesn't mean I haven't been accomplishing things!
  • As a photographer, I am the official photographer for both The Dorothy Awards and PRIDE New Haven, both of which are my biggest shoots of every year.  My photos have appeared in most issues of Centerline Magazine.
  • I have also been published in the Connecticut 169 Club compilation by Martin Podskotch (both as a writer and photographer).
  • I have been the President of the Sterling Historical Society now for two years and actively researching/writing the next history book.
  • I am also really active in the Nutmeg Button Club in Killingworth, CT and also the Connecticut State Button Society.
  • As if I actually have time to pursue all these things, I'm also an antiques dealer.

So what all this means for this website is that I will be turning it into a brand to market my talents and knowledge, whether it is photography, writing, history, or buttons, and therefore putting this whole place to a much better use.




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New Projects!

4/4/2015

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I am SO excited, I can hardly contain myself.

All this blathering of not feeling any inspiration, blah blah blahhhhhhhherggggggggh--

Let's go back to the beginning.

A couple weeks ago, I started a new Instagram account for my Etsy shop since my personal Instagram had turned into daily babies, socks, and Saab 900's with lots of shots of what I was working on creating, jewelry wise.  Since 2008, I've been selling handmade jewelry on Etsy along with buttons (& other craft supplies) and vintage clothing (and wares).   I decided I wanted to separate out all the Etsy stuff so I could turn it into more of a marketing platform to drive more customers to my shop.  (Being honest here, it's a smart marketing move.)

Within a couple days, I was inspired to join in on #buttonaday, posting literally a button a day.  Not only did I want to join in on that fun, but I also wanted to photograph buttons better than I have been for my shop, and showcase details on them, which is something I've had an interest in ever since I started selling them.  Some of the buttons I post are for sale, some aren't.

I don't know where that project is going to go, but I'm definitely having a blast with it.
Buttons buttons buttons buttons buttons!
Another project I decided to get in on was #creativedaily, and I've been having a lot of fun there too.
#creativedaily's list for April by @lu_and_ed:
4/1: Pale Pink
4/2: Creamsicle Orange
4/3: Light Yellow
4/4: Mint Green
4/5: Baby Blue (HAH! I AM SO FUNNY, and yes I did 4/5 a day ahead of time but that's because tomorrow is Easter and I don't want to get caught up in the swing of things for the day and forget.  Monday is Lavender, haven't thought up anything yet)
So for some reason, creating a focused Instagram helped my muse come back.  Great! Let's keep going.  If you want to follow along with these two daily projects, come find me on Instagram  @mannequinreject .
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The Dorothy Awards

3/26/2015

2 Comments

 
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2015 Dorothy Awards, March 7, 2015
Can I tell you a secret?

If you've attended the Dorothy Awards hosted by the New Haven Pride Center, you will know that I've been photographing the event for them every year since 2012.

What you didn't know, is that the 2012 shoot was a near disaster.  And I mean DISASTER.

So let's travel back to March of 2012, when I was shooting on a near daily basis for Community Health Center, Inc. (CHC) and working as a mail carrier for USPS every Saturday and Monday to boot.  I was in the middle of a very messy, mean, nasty divorce.  I owned only one Canon 7D, an external flash, and a kit lens, a 24mm f/2.8 prime lens, and of course the famous "nifty 50"--Canon's $99 50mm f/1.8 prime lens.

This was how I walked into the first Dorothy Awards shoot, after having put in a solid 8 hours for USPS, and driving an hour away from home--to Fantasia, a banquet facility in North Haven.  Already spent, in other words.

I walked into the ballroom at Fantasia and
just about shat an entire yellow brick road.  There were bright red spotlights illuminating the room, a far cry from the dinners I was used to shooting in crappy light situations for CHC.  There were two other photographers shooting that night as well--might I add, neither of whom were self taught and one of whom had far superior equipment to my own.

Ohgodohgodohgod

!!!

Instantly I knew the only two lenses I could shoot the entire night with were the two primes I had.

That's it.  Two primes.

And do you know why? Because I was one of those jerks who couldn't figure out her $500 Speedlite (external flash).  Like many photographers, I HATE the flash.  HATE.  Natural light all the way, even if it is bright-freaking-red!  (hi, fauxtographers!)

Overheard that night in the ballroom, "She's shooting without the flash? That takes B-A-L-L-S."
 
TOTAL DISASTER. I would never live down the shame of this night, they would never invite me back, ohgodohgodohgod.

SHOOT ANYWAY. 
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What the hell was I thinking, calling myself a professional?  Everything is red!  White balance is for the birds!
One of the other photographers handed me his camera (a 5D Mark II) for a group photo, which was fine because I knew he had done all the settings and all I had to do was frame and shoot.  (Though I did steal a glimpse at his settings, totally. Thanks Kenn!)  I was glad to see how his photo turned out, because my shot of the same group was just...oh forget it.

Halfway through the night I told Josh, one of the organizers, not to pay me for the shoot, so the pressure was off.  I can't say that made the photos any better, because it really didn't.

I went back to Norwich feeling very defeated, but ready to work on it the following day.
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I was so emo about this I didn't even get the date right - 2011? LOL.  Look, isn't that this blog post in the background?  Isn't that the plot line for Inception?  I didn't see the movie.
So the next day I set to work on the photos from the event. It didn't look good, but I figured since I did it for free, I would salvage what I could.  That red wash on the photos made such a mess of everything! I flailed around in photoshop and drank a couple liters of Mountain Dew.

Suddenly this...
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Became THIS...
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and ended up here:
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April 2012 Cover of Metroline!
(Which I discovered a year later.)

Out of the 1400+ photos I had taken that night, I was able to only salvage 102.

102.  Less than 10 percent.  What remained was so over-processed that I knew it was really pushing the limits of acceptable.
That week, I threw down $1600 on a new lens (the Canon 24-70 f/2.8 L series), vowing to never let this happen again.  A good photographer never blames his equipment--but a good photographer also knows that equipment has limits. 

Fast-forward to March 2013, and things had changed!  I had just moved days before, everything was in boxes in Brent's race car trailer.  I was working in a new USPS office on a terrible route that was very long, but since the previous Dorothy's I had upgraded all of my equipment and had a bunch of L-series lenses...

...but CHC had just disappeared from my client list, and I was very much still in the middle of a crisis of confidence. (They said it wasn't my fault, budget blown, etc etc etc...but I still blamed myself.)

However, red spotlights be damned, at least I knew how to deal with them!  My only complaint is that I can't see well enough to know when my camera is in perfect focus thanks to astigmatism.  Excuses, excuses.  Nothing irks me more than seeing a blown shot on the screen that looked fine in the camera.  NOTHING.  So I blew some shots, but overall didn't feel bad about the 2013 Dorothy's.
I even landed another Metroline cover!  However...I never saw it, I don't even know which photo it was.  If anyone has a copy of the April 2013 issue of Metroline, I would really appreciate either a copy or a photo of the cover.
By 2014 you would think I've got this down pat, right?

Of course not!  I was 8 weeks pregnant in the throes of morning sickness (which translates to all day sickness).  Brent came with me on the shoot as an assistant to do the Step and Repeat photos, and I had put in a very long day at USPS again (you'd think I would learn to just take Saturdays off for the Dorothy's by now...) and we barely even got there on time.  I was overly confident that I nailed it until I started editing and I was just not happy with what I was seeing. Still, I submitted photos the same as I always did and figured it wasn't a big deal to anyone but myself.
However I was wrong and someone wasn't happy with the photos submitted.  So--crisis of confidence over losing CHC still ONGOING even though it had been two freaking years-- I said to hell with everything and put all of my equipment up for sale, until I realized that it wasn't worth selling at 1/4 what I paid for it and I would never get it back again.  When I was working for CHC I could afford to upgrade to professional equipment but that certainly was no longer in the cards.  So while I was very public about selling my equipment, I had only sold my lighting to Brent's brother, and quietly took my for sale postings down and decided to re-think the whole thing.

I figured the Dorothy's were done for, though.  I didn't think I'd be asked to come back. 
I left USPS in August and had my little boy in October. I was only using my camera to do product photography for my own Etsy shop.
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In January of this year my friend, Josh, contacted me asking if I still had my equipment and if I would be up to doing the Dorothy's.  Say...what?  What happened to the person who wasn't happy with 2014?  Josh said I would receive a shot list so I would know what to shoot this year.  Okay, I've done shot lists.  I wouldn't have to worry about the Step and Repeat.  Okay, okay, okay.  For those of you who don't know--I've known Josh since 2002 when we were at Fairfield U. together &, we've been close friends since 2003.  He's had the misfortune of seeing me at my worst probably more times than either one of us cares to admit, LOL.

A couple of days before the Dorothy's, Josh sent me a shot list, so I figured we would be ready to go, until I looked at it.  Turns out he had accidentally sent me the rundown of Coronation for the Imperial Sovereign Court of all of CT. Crisis averted, he sent me the correct shot list the next day.  Other small crisises involved finding my clothes that I hadn't worn since the previous Dorothy's which took 4 freaking hours and one of my backup batteries and chargers was missing...and still is...come to think of it I should ask if anyone has seen them...I didn't want to post the day before the Dorothy's because I didn't want anyone else to lose more confidence in me than I lose in myself.  I have more than one backup battery, but still.

Come showtime, my little boy decided to be up all night and I went into the Dorothy's on THREE HOURS OF SLEEP.  (You know what? My little boy is chewing on my arm right now as I type this.  I should feed him.)
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Yeah, should definitely feed him instead of writing a blog post no one will read. LOOK AT THAT FACE.
So you know what I did?  I broke my cardinal rule of not drinking coffee the day of a shoot (so my hands don't get shaky) and drank an extra large regular from Dunkin on my way down to North Haven.  I hadn't even had coffee with caffeine since I found out I was pregnant--more than a year before.

WHATEVER.
 
When I showed up at Fantasia, immediately someone remarked that they thought I wasn't going to be shooting this year, but he was so warm and welcoming I felt so much better about doing the shoot.  I was pretty talkative thanks to the coffee.  Can you tell I drank an entire pot today?

As for the shoot itself, it's not like I haven't been learning how to do things properly since 2012, I do know how my flash works finally, though I prefer not to use it.  I would certainly hope I've learned something. 
As for that awful red spotlight, I look forward to it.

Here's to next year's Dorothy Awards, and I will see you all there!
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A Look Back: Day on Earth 

2/26/2015

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February 3, 2007: A male cardinal perched in my backyard, Brooklyn, CT 1:45PM
A couple weeks back, a friend of mine asked me to make her a bracelet with a charm with a cardinal.  I didn't have any cardinal charms, but I did have the ability to make a photo charm, and this photo instantly came to mind.

Back in 2007, LiveJournal had a community called "Day on Earth" where you could post a photo of where you were on earth so long as you posted the location and the time.  It was fun to contribute and the best photo was chosen by the moderator to be the representative post of the day.  I contributed a few times over the course of the year, from January through September, and it was not unlike how Instagram is today (though it was more photojournalism and fine art than selfies and food).  I had a couple features in the community, including this photo as well as January 6 (which was the first post I ever posted there--nailed the top post!).

I collected the photos I posted there and uploaded as a photo essay to Smugmug, because I was, and still am, proud of the photos I took that year for a daily competition I really enjoyed.  These were taken with my Kodak DX7590, which may have been a point and shoot but was definitely the camera that showed me what I was capable of.

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Vanilla Chai Adventures

1/11/2015

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Main Administration, Norwich State Hospital
December 1, 2014
Hipstamatic / Tintype App

My last entry mentioned how little inspiration I was feeling with iphoneography as of late, so I decided to get some of that back. With an infant, some days, it's darn near impossible to get out of the house.  Every day, I want a vanilla chai.

Thus, Vanilla Chai Adventures.  I don't even have to go far, maybe a couple miles down the road, but surely there is something out there to photograph while I'm out and about.

Since I take all the photos with burst mode, I pick the best one and putz around in different photo apps, usually Oggl/Hipstamatic. 

When the weather gets warmer, I'm sure I'll be out there with my 7D.  Sorry about neglecting the blogs, hopefully I'll be able to blog more often very soon!

Also, here's the photo of the week, taken tonight with the iPhone 5S, Oggl/Hipstamatic app.
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More thoughts on photo diaries...

11/4/2014

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Middletown at Night, December 2011
iPhone 4s, Hipstamatic
When I first got my iPhone, back in late 2011, I was creatively inspired by the plethora of what seemed to be a million different photo apps.  I'm not going to lie, I went for the iPhone solely for the Hipstamatic app.  It was before Instagram's surge in popularity , before it was acquired by Facebook, before everyone and your mother had it for selfies. Granted, there were still a lot of selfies and even more pictures of food, but there was something new about it. 

When I finally got my coveted iPhone (leaving a broken Blackberry behind), I didn't know what I should use Instagram for.  I had Hipstamatic for filters, why use two apps for the same thing? 

I decided to use Instagram as a daily photo diary.  For some reason, I was inspired by that, and that alone.

It's been almost 3 years since I started my "photo of the day" project and honestly, I don't feel so inspired by it anymore.  Most days I have a hard time searching around for something to take a photo of, and it's been like this since long before my son was born or I got pregnant or whatever. 

I had gotten a lot out of the photo diary at first.  It captured a lot of emotions in ways I couldn't quite put in words, and maybe that's why it was so inspiring at the time.  It captured the awkwardness of the first time my husband and I hung out outside of work, EVER. 
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Yes, it really was this awkward.
(February 2012)
However, it also captured some beautiful moments that I've since blown up and framed on my wall--I have an entire photo essay done over the course of a week on Instagram.
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Washed Up -January 2012
This is a far cry from what shows up on my Instagram feed presently.  It's a far cry from what would show up when I was on assignment for...anything. 

When it feels like my instagram has been a year of "look at the stump in my yard on fire" and "God, I eat a lot of hospital quality pudding" and "I really don't want to be one of those parents who only post pictures of their kids...but my son is all I look at all day" it's hard to not want to just give it up and post when I photograph something really COOL. 

A part of me wants to give up on the photo-a-day thing, but maybe I shouldn't.  It's not like I don't know how to keep a journal or a blog --I've been keeping a journal on a regular basis since 1997 and on and off prior to that since 1992, and writing is the one thing I can seem to stay with.

Sometimes, my instagram serves as a reminder of things I need to write about, but when a lot of my days are the same thing over and over, I really start digging.  I don't have this problem with writing, I can write about anything.  Photos for a "photo of the day"...not so much.

I know I had terrible "I am SO not inspired" days in the beginning of my instagram account, but the fantastic shots far outnumbered the "I did my taxes all day and got Chinese food takeout for my photo of the day" shots. 

If I gave it up, what would I miss?  I've only missed less than 10 photos per year since I started it.  I miss being surprised by the art that my ever-present phone can help me create, maybe I miss the fun of exploring a new photo app.

I was going to post all my awesome photo diary shots from 2012-2014 but they ended up being far too numerous for just one post.  I also discovered that I shied away from black and white photography in the beginning and yet that seems to make up the majority of my favorite photos now.

Anyway, here's a couple highlights.
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Double Exposure, Aftermath of Hurricane Sandy at Misquamicut, November 2012, iPhone4s, Hipstamatic

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No Name Castle, September 2012

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Mountain Laurel with Bee on Lantern Hill, June 2013
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Engaged at Irving Cliff, August 2013
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Rocky Point, October 2014
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Labor Photo Diary

10/29/2014

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At 36 weeks and 4 days, I took this photo while waiting for the doctor, and I had no idea what I was in for.
For a photographer, I have surprisingly few photos from my pregnancy, mostly consisting of bathroom mirror myspace selfies.  I didn't do a weekly bump series or even have a maternity shoot of my own (besides my wedding...ha!)  If I were interested in that, I would have done it.  I'm a little bummed we never got the maternity shoot, but money is tight.

My instagram is a daily "photo diary" but half the time it's not even artistic and most of the photos just remind me of what I have to write about.  I was a writer long before I was a photographer.  So it went with pregnancy--I preferred to write about it and didn't do a huge photo-related project.

So at 36 weeks and 4 days, when the photo above was taken, I was about to learn that our unborn son possibly had a congenital heart defect.  This possibility hung over the last month of the pregnancy and took away a lot of the excitement we had since we didn't know what was going to happen once he was out of the womb.  Would he need open heart surgery?  How long would he be in the NICU? 

As it turns out, he did not have the heart defect we all feared.  He spent 4 days in the NICU to monitor that.  I ended up having an emergency C-section as well.

Since I was in a hospital an hour away from home, we left my camera at home and relied on cell phones. (We didn't know that we weren't allowed to use cell phones in the NICU, so we have few pictures of our son while in the hospital.  We do have some, I just didn't take them.)

Since he's been home, we have been busy getting 4-generation photos with all of the living great-grandparents, and a couple photos here and there. 
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Buggy Kitty

9/28/2014

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Buggy Kitty, March 2013
iPhone 4S with Hipstamatic
Buggy was my inlaw's cat and Brent's buddy for 14 years.  She disappeared last Sunday night and we're afraid she's gone now.

Most of my pictures of Buggy were taken with my iPhone and a variety of apps, so I wanted to share my favorite photos of her here.
Buggy, May 2013
Canon 7D
Buggy and Brent, 2012 and Buggy in March 2013.  iPhone 4S, Instagram & Hipstamatic.
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Favorite shot of the week 8/28

8/28/2014

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I shot this while taking a break from clothing photography for my Etsy shop, 8/26.
I'm 34 weeks pregnant.  Wrestling a mannequin is tiresome.
By the end of shooting on this day, the mannequin looked like she had just rolled out of bed and she would have been a little more convincing with a bottle of Jack in her hand.  There's a couple photos that ended up on Etsy with her wig crooked and just dumped on her head.  I shot 8 dresses before it was nap time.


I know I don't have the best photography setup for clothing on a mannequin, either.  That's been evolving since I started selling vintage clothes  in 2008 and trust me, what I've got now is way better than what I started with.  I know it doesn't look as professional as it could but you know what, it gets the job done.  I've got 75 pieces of clothes to shoot and no assistants to get that mannequin dressed and undressed.  I'm not shooting for a portfolio here, or at least, not yet.  Probably never.  I just want to sell dresses.

I'm thinking of outing my past clothing photography endeavors over on my other blog, because I found some real doozies yesterday while reminiscing about the way I used to do this.

Anyway, here's a little behind the scenes look at my Etsy photoshoot.  I haven't been taking many pictures otherwise.
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It's so hard not to photograph your own wedding

8/13/2014

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I didn't really shoot my own wedding...much.  I swear!
(photo by Brandon Chance)
So Brent and I got married on Sunday!  We only planned it for 5 days, with all the major stuff planned in the first 24 hours of those 5 days.

I'm sure you're all wondering how the heck I found a wedding photographer available on a summer weekend to shoot a wedding on less than a week's notice.

I didn't.  I didn't even look, because I know I can't afford myself, nevermind wedding photographers who charge 2x-3x what I do (which would be $1500, and it's only that low because I don't shoot a lot of weddings and I don't market myself as a wedding photographer).

I understand the pricing that goes into wedding photography, I truly do.  I have the equipment and the talent and all that you read about why you should hire a $3000 wedding photographer.  I can preach that too.

But sometimes...you just can't.  I'm 7 months pregnant.  We're down to one income as of now.  Our house might need a well.  $3000 for a photographer-though I know it's worth it- just isn't happening when the whole wedding came in under $2000 and that was with a LOT of help from our families.  (And we cannot thank you enough!)

I've been watching up and coming wedding photographers for years, watching as their prices went up...and schedules filled, and prices went up again. They're making it.  It's awesome seeing them grow.  Was I a little sad that they have all ended up out of my budget? Of course.

But again.  FIVE DAYS.  Last Tuesday morning we didn't know we were getting married, and by Wednesday afternoon we had the minister, place, dress, license, rings, some food ordered, all guests invited.  The next few days just involved decorations and party favor prep.

I figured, it's crunch time.  One of our mutual friends, Katherine, had offered to shoot the wedding; she loves photography and shoots with the Canon EOS system.  She even has a 60D, which is just what, one step down from my 7D's?  I told her I'd let her use my cameras, she knows Canon, she could use my lenses if my cameras gave her any crap, etc.

Understandably, both of us were nervous!  We had wanted to get together to do some practice shooting and check out the location, but I ended up having to work the day before the wedding and all our shooting plans fell through, so it was left up to the two hours before the wedding.

I just had to keep reminding myself that there was once a "first wedding" shoot for me, and I was nervous about that shoot, and I was shooting with a Rebel XS with a kit lens (that terrible little 18-55mm!) and everyone had been happy with those photos. 


Hell, Kath had more official instruction in photography than I do -- because I've only learned from years of hands-on experience and reading, and doing.  She took film photography courses while in high school, but her high school had an outstanding art program that's the envy of probably every high school in this state.  Film is different than digital, of course, but it's not like she doesn't shoot digital.  Her camera is decent and I've got L-series lenses. For crying out loud, what was I worrying about?

Besides, I was shooting stills of decor and party favors the morning of the wedding myself to take some of the pressure off the standard wedding stills that don't involve people. 

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While I was getting more and more nervous about the photography, I think Kath was getting less and less nervous.  And then, as is prone to happen on a wedding day, all hell broke loose with everything not involving photography.  Hell breaking loose includes me forgetting a rather important part of my wardrobe, running home to get it, and having my car break down immediately when I got back to my grandparents', which is where the reception was and where all the decor was set up (above).  I still had to get to my in-laws to have my hair done and didn't want Brent to find out my car was dead again since this is a problem we've been chasing on the car since May and we thought we'd already fixed it.  So photography worries went right out the window.

Eventually, I made it to the in-laws and Kath met me there.  We chatted photography while my hair was done, and then it was go time.

Another friend of ours, Brandon, was shooting with Kath's extra Rebel XSi, as her assistant, since he's just getting into it. 

Between the two of them and the couple times I stole my camera back, they did it.  I'm happy with the photos, and that's kind of a tall order to fill when normally I'm on the other side of the lens.

We had a beautiful ceremony and a perfect day!  Even if we'd spent six months or a year planning this and thousands of dollars more, we couldn't have had a more perfect day.
 

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Here's one of my favorites! (photo by Katherine Thomas)
Just some practice edits, which is left up to me, though I'll be giving Kath her photos so she can do some edits because each photographer's eye is different.
So yeah.  All that stuff they say about investing in photography; it's all well and good if you can actually afford to do it.  My investment was in my equipment and every photographer knows that it's not the camera body, it's the LENS.  Is it nerve wracking to step aside and let someone else shoot because you can't clone yourself?  TOTALLY.

Anyway, huge shout out to Katherine and Brandon for the awesome job.  It's not easy and I know there was a lot of pressure, but in the end we had a great time!   
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